If you are wondering how to stop caring what people think, you are in good company.
To care about what other people think is a part of our nature. We as humans crave connection with other humans.
But caring too much about what we assume other people think of us can turn into a negative anxiety spiral that can actually be very hard to get out of.
So here are some crucial tips, so you can confidently break into your own power. It’s time to become more assertive, more confident and not just a people pleaser or push-over.
How To Not CareWhat People Think
Being accepted and fitting in is a large goal a lot of us have in life. That’s why we try so hard to have the right job, to attract the right partner, to get married, have children, to buy a home, etc.
Checking off the list of things we’re “supposed” to do because that’s what everyone else does.
The problem is throughout this process, we forget who we are.
We stop listening to the things we want to be doing and eventually lose sight of what gives us purpose.
Then you end up waking up one day, wondering what you’re doing with your life. Negative thinking and anxiety form as a result.
Drawing the line between caring what others think of you and what you think of you is important.
You can’t stop listening to yourself, even when you worry about what others might think.
Go after the things you want in life, despite what others say.
Because at the end of the day, you have to be on your side. And the people who don’t mind what you do will stand by your side, too.
Why Do We Care So Much About What Other People Think?
This goes back to being a child. Think about elementary or middle school.
If you wanted to hang out with the cool kids, you had to do what they liked.
Otherwise, you’d get made fun of. And as a kid, no one likes to get made fun of. It’s a crucial time in your life that morphs you into who you become as an adult.
We spend 12 years in school, learning how to be a certain way.
And if you tried really hard to fit in and be accepted by people, that most likely has bled into how you act as an adult.
Trying to break that cycle is difficult because it’s going against everything you were taught growing up.
Letting go of what others think and listening to yourself is like speaking a different language. These days social media makes it even harder than before. It is all around us every minute of every day. How many times have you looked at that old friend from high school and silently judged their life, their weight, or their hair? We all do. The key is to not let social media become reality and not let it drive our thoughts.
The truth is, we won’t ever fully stop caring about what others think of us. And that’s OK!
It’s good, actually. Because that means you still care about being kind to others. How to not care what people think starts deep within yourself, and it is completely natural.
Not caring at all what people think can lead to possibly becoming heartless, so there is a fine balance.
Signs You Care Too Much
Often assume what other people think of you. Such as “That person probably thinks I’m an idiot.”
Try way too hard to get people to like you
Put yourself last
Saying no or setting boundaries feels impossible
Always try to be one step ahead of what other people are thinking
Get anxious if someone is upset with you
Base your value on what others think about you
One wrong look from someone makes you question yourself
How Can You Stop Caring What People Think?
Letting go of what others think about you is possible. It just will require some effort on your part. And self-reflecting.
Here are some ways to work on your ability not to care what people think
1. Stop Overgeneralizing
Overgeneralizing is when you experience something bad that sticks with you, and assume it’s going to happen every time.
One bad experience shapes how you view every other possible future experience with the same scenario.
Let’s say when you were a kid you got made fun of for having a big nose.
So, whenever someone is talking to you, and you catch them looking at you weirdly, you immediately think it’s because of your big nose.
When in reality, it could be a number of reasons. Possibly just because the person is contemplating how to respond to what you said.
When you care too much about what others think, overgeneralizing can trigger anxiety.
It can also prevent you from putting yourself in situations that might require someone noticing your nose.
Overgeneralizing is all made up in your head. And giving power to those thoughts will make it feel like you’re not good enough.
Most of the time, people don’t notice the things you think they do. You’re just hyper-aware of it because it did happen before. And even if you do have a big nose, what’s so wrong about it?
You have to continue to ask yourself these questions and challenge the negative thoughts in your head.
This will allow you to reflect on yourself, instead of focusing so much on what others think.
2. Remember Everyone Feels the Same as You
If you can take a step back and look around you, you’ll notice that everyone has their own insecurities.
The ones they can’t bear when someone points out. No matter who it is, or how old they are. People feel the same as you. Never ever think you are alone, trust me you are not.
So, when you’re sitting there talking to someone, just remember that they are most likely more worried about what you think of them. Treat them how you would like to be treated. Listen before you judge, in fact don’t judge at all.
They are not judging you.
Unless you are doing something that is offensive or hurtful, most people don’t judge like that. They are way too focused on themselves to even care if you have a big nose. a Lot of people might actually love your nose.
3. Work on Finding Yourself
When you’re so focused on everyone else’s opinions of you, you aren’t listening to the most important person: Yourself.
The voices in your head can get insanely loud sometimes, and they can make you doubt yourself.
From your own inner critic to assuming what other people are thinking, it’s hard to quiet the noise and hear what you have to say.
So try to focus on yourself more. Write down the things you love about yourself, and what you really enjoy doing.
Spend some time alone, away from the outside noise. This might mean you have to start from scratch. Losing yourself is a common thing that happens in life.
Because we do the things we think we should do, not what we want to do.
If you can instead start focusing on what you enjoy, you will stop caring about what other people think. Because you’ll be having fun and enjoying life, and you won’t want those negative thoughts to ruin it.
Pleasing people and perfectionism are as real as a unicorn. So think that when you are trying to do these things, you might as well be trying to find a unicorn.
Don’t be afraid of losing people. Be afraid of losing yourself by trying to please everyone around you.
If you can learn this sooner in life, you will be one step ahead of most people in the world.
We are all unique, and you were made who you are right now for a reason. If we were all supposed to be the same, we’d all look exactly the same.
Embrace the fact that you are who you are. And let go of trying to please other people.
Because the people who love you and support you don’t need that. Being yourself is all they could ever want.
The people who ask you to change are the ones you might want to reconsider being around.
Because it’s impossible. And when you place your value on what others think of you, you lose complete sight of the value you already hold.
5. Stop Making up Stories in Your Head
Nothing ruins confidence more than assuming everything. Unless you can get the hard cold facts, don’t believe everything your brain is telling you.
We tell ourselves things based on past experiences, people’s body language, and how we view ourselves.
Mix all three of these together and you have a toxic mindset.
You have to fight off those evil thoughts that form in your head. If someone was pissed at you for no reason, that’s on them.
You can self-reflect and double-check you didn’t do anything wrong, and then you have to let it go.
Get rid of negative people who put those thoughts into your head.
Replace the made-up stories with real ones.
How To Stop Caring What People Think – Conclusion
It can be hard to learn how to not care what people think. But if you practice these tips, your self-confidence will grow over time. With practice, you won’t worry about what anyone is thinking about you, and you can believe in yourself, uninterrupted. Never stop believing in the magic of you. Although it might not always feel like it, you might be someone else’s hero, and they might look up to you. Start to worry more about what you think of yourself than what other people think of you.
Remind yourself that you are good enough, you are a kind person, you give love and receive love, and you deserve anything you want in this world.
Then let the rest of those stories go. Once you can learn to do all of these things, you will let go of caring about what others think of you.
Guess what topped our self-care gift guide this year? Some pretty awesome, thoughtful gift ideas, that’s what!
Whether you are shopping for yourself or someone else, self-love is always a good starting point for anyone.
It’s 2019 going into 2020, and if you don’t emphasize self-love, you’re missing out on a lot of things. It’s the movement, it’s everywhere these days.
And if you personally know someone who deserves to be pampered, this is the perfect self-care gift guide for you to choose from.
Self-Care Gift Guide – The Most-Wanted Items Of 2020
Here, I have rounded up a list of amazing self-care gifts that will motivate you to treat yourself with love.
The best part about this is everything will be kept under $200!
1. Little Book of Mindfulness
If you know someone who loves reading books, give them this book as their self-care gift this year.
With 5-10 minutes of practice per day, you can be assured that whoever is receiving this book will be able to focus on letting go of their stressful thought.
Mindfulness is the new thing these days and finding hours to have that special me-time is very important.
This book is definitely one of the best in this self-care gift guide.
You can fill in the dates and you have fun prompts like “things I learned today” or “the moments that made me laugh today”.
Little things like that can really change your mood. Self-care is really one of the best things you can do for yourself.
5. Ceramic Ultrasonic Essential Oil Diffuser
For people who have sensitive noses and those who love the art of aromatherapy, get them this minimalist-looking Vitruvi Stone Diffuser.
It comes in four different color options but my personal favorites are the ones in black and terracotta colors.
Each of these high-quality oil diffusers is carefully handcrafted with ceramic and can contain up to 90ml capacity.
You can set the setting to 3 hours of continuous usage or 7 hours of interval settings.
The choice is yours. What makes this one of the best gifts in this self-care gift guide is the fact that it’s a BPA-free plastic water reservoir.
6. Premium Subscription to a Self-Care App
Have you ever heard of the Shine app? I love the free version and it makes daily self-care so easy to focus on.
If you get the free version of the Shine app, you will get a motivational message on a weekday basis.
But if you want, you can get your loved one the annual premium subscription as their self-care gift this year.
Premium access includes challenges to help you overcome insomnia, productivity problems, burnout, and more. On top of that, you get access to more than 500 meditations!
7. A Subscription To FabFitFun
There is just something extra special about getting a giant box of surprise self-care items on your doorstep every season. That excitement is exactly what FabFitFun delivers.
Four times a year, they send a beautiful box packed to the brim with the best beauty, lifestyle, home, and tech items for women.
Everyone is loving The Business Boutique Goal Planner 2020: Your Personal Guide to Getting Results. I have it, I love it, and think it is the best planner ever created.
Yes, it has all the calendars, reminders, and scheduling space you could ever need, but it also offers so much more!
It actually includes a full year of goal-crushing tips and coaching. It’s a big book. packed with a ton of useful content.
The best gifts for single women can range from pampering and thoughtful, to humorously self-deprecating. Depending on the type of friendship you have with the single lady you’re buying for, you can really go either way.
If she just had a breakup, you may want to choose the single girl gift ideas below that will help her feel better about herself. Or if she has been proudly single for years, one of the funny gifts for single women here will make her smile.
Today you’re in luck because I have compiled a great list of the best gifts for single women.
Any of these would make a great Christmas, birthday, or Galentine’s Day gift for your single girlfriend.
The Best Gifts For Single Women
1. Singles Swag Box
Singles Swag is a subscription box curated specifically for single women. Each month she will get a collection of unique organic beauty products, trendy fashion and lifestyle items, tasty treats, and even books and other educational resources.
Another fabulous subscription box that makes a wonderful present for a single woman is FabFitFun, which delivers 4 times a year.
2. Ninja Coffee Bar Brewer
This smart coffee brewer is a perfect gift for single women who need coffee to function in their daily lives. I love the Ninja Coffee Bar Brewer because it comes with an easy-fill brew basket and all you have to do is slide the basket out quickly and fill it with your favorite coffee.
It also comes in four different sizes from a cup, and travel mug, to half carafe and full carafe.
3. Single AF Pin / Brooch
This ever-so-cute best-selling pin found here is beautifully handmade. And eloquent …”A.F.”
With its energy-efficient LED grow lights and soil-free seed pods, this garden system comes in handy for garden lovers who want to plant something without a mess. It also features a water reminder and will automatically turn the light on or off.
Help your single friends to feel good about themselves again by getting them the Dyson Supersonic Hair Dryer.
It prevents extreme damage while protecting the hair shine and is engineered for different types of hair. This is one of the best holiday gifts for single women who love to look good for themselves. It’s worth every penny.
8. Margarita & Slush Machine
Surprise your single friend with this amazing margarita and slush machine! Every single woman who just went through a bad breakup needs a good drink, and what better way to surprise them than giving them the opportunity to make one at home?
With the Nostalgia Margarita and Slush Machine, you can easily make up to 1 gallon of your favorite slush drink. Not to mention the fact that this machine is transferrable with its carrying handle.
9. Single AF Wine Glasses
Just imagine the cute Instagram photos you’ll take together with these at the next girl’s-night-in party, with the Single AF wine glasses.
10. Vegan Leather Laptop Backpack
One of the best gifts for single women is a professional laptop backpack that is not only ideal for work but also good for traveling, too.
I personally love this one because the style is personally and aesthetically tailored for women. The padded and sleek structure of the contoured straps offers enough support for the body. Definitely a great gift idea for a single woman.
11. Drinking Buddies Hunk Drink Markers
Next time she hosts girl’s night at her place, everyone can drop a color-coded hunk into their glass, so no one loses/mixes up their drinks.
12. 7-Speed Folding Bike
By getting your single friend a bicycle, you’re not only making her happy but you’re encouraging her to stay healthy.
It’s normal for people who just went through a breakup to stay indoors most of the time, but if you want to help her re-start her life again, you should get her something that gets her out of the house. The EuroMini ZiZZO 7-Speed Folding Bike makes a great gift.
13. Wellbeing Class
Refine Your Life Purpose & Wellness offers mental wellness and anxiety relief exercises, advice on finding your inner strength and life purpose, and overall self-improvement.
14. A Book Celebrating Singledom
The book in the gallery above makes a great gift for single women.
15. Some Instagramable New Clothes
After a breakup, many women try a new hairstyle or go on a shopping spree buying clothes in a completely different style than they’ve had in the past. A fresh new look can really help someone’s confidence, especially after a bad breakup.
Help give her confidence a boost by picking out a few Instagram-worthy outfits at Pretty Young Thing. This online retailer is adored by Instagram influencers.
Check out their Basics Collection, where you can stock up on clothes that will make her look like Kylie Jenner, without spending a Kylie Jenner fortune.
The Best Gifts For Single Women – Conclusion
Let me know in the comments if you tried any of my gifts for single womenrecommendations today!
Please share and pin this article.
For more resources on building self-confidence, and getting over a breakup, check out my articles listed below.
How to get rid of negative thinking so you can live a better life. Negative thoughts create an alternative world in your head. They are defeating and can convince of pretty much anything.
Negative thinking can and will take over your life if you allow it. But, there are ways to push past it and see the good in things.
Changing your mindset might sound impossible, but it’s actually quite easy.
How To Get Rid Of Negative Thinking
Imagine what your life would be like without doubt or fear preventing you from trying new things. Where you decide to take a chance on things despite the outcome. Because you aren’t afraid of making the wrong decision.
And even if you did end up making a horrible mistake, you wouldn’t resort to feeling like a total failure who isn’t capable of anything. Instead, you’d be upset, but it wouldn’t take over your whole day. You’d learn from it and move on.
This is a rational way of thinking. What makes it complicated is the fact that working on your mental health isn’t deemed as important in society.
We are all way too focused on making more money, buying new things, and distracting ourselves from our thoughts. We also weren’t given the proper tools to know how to handle our thoughts, when they get out of control.
That doesn’t mean that it’s overly complicated, though. It just means you’ll have to make the decision to make your mental health a priority and work on it every day. Just like brushing your teeth or working out.
Money Doesn’t Buy Happiness, But Having More Money Does Help Boost Mental Wellness
They say money doesn’t buy happiness. But as someone who used to have very little, and now earns quite a lot, I can honestly say that having a safety net of savings and regular income coming in absolutely gives one peace of mind.
We have thousands and thousands of thoughts in a single day. Some are totally random, some are intentional, and some are conscious.
Like when you take a look at yourself in the mirror, a quick thought might cross your mind before you even register it.
It’s so second nature that you might not even realize you’re having a negative thought. To stop the negative thoughts from creeping in, pay attention to when they are happening.
Do they happen in front of the mirror? In a large group of people? Around your family? At work? Don’t let those negative thoughts pass by without any recognition.
They secretly make you feel bad, without you even getting a say in it. That’s the power of your inner critic, she’s a sneaky one.
When you figure out when those negative thoughts are happening, that’s when you can start stopping them in their tracks, by knowing when they come around. Break down those thoughts into bite-sized pieces.
If you hear them when you’re looking in the mirror, you can work on quieting them by being more aware when you look in the mirror.
Every single person out there has negative thoughts. We all have an inner critic. Whether or not you choose to listen to yours is up to you.
You can still have negative thoughts and not let them control what you do. The less value you give the bad thoughts, the more they just become thoughts.
When you have negative thoughts, instead of letting them freak you out, why not just look at them for what they are? Let them pass by like a cloud and observe what they are telling you.
Let’s say your thoughts are saying you shouldn’t go out with this guy because it probably won’t work out. Unless there are red flags from the start, give it a shot anyway.
3. Rationalize Your Thoughts
Negative thoughts don’t provide much value. They just convince you to feel terrible, instead of allowing you to feel happy.
I don’t really think there is any good that comes out of negative thinking. So, when you start feeling negative, work on rationalizing those thoughts.
If you don’t feel very positive about where your life is heading and think “I am such a loser, my life isn’t going anywhere and I might as well get used to feeling like this.”
Ask why you feel that way. What is causing those bad thoughts? Are they helping you in any way? What are you making up in your head, that is most likely not true? And then think about how those thoughts aren’t doing anything but making you feel like crap.
When you can choose to rationalize those thoughts and say:
It feels like my life isn’t going anywhere just because I am learning how to figure things out. It’s a process, and some days are harder than others. It doesn’t mean I won’t get my life figured out, it just means I have to give myself a break and continue to do my best. My negative thoughts only make the situation worse, when I could be working on encouraging myself to keep moving forward.
Try to talk to yourself like you would your best friend. If your friend is feeling bad about their life, think about what you’d tell them to make them feel better.
But, in this case, do it to yourself! To get rid of negative thinking, stop those bad thoughts in their tracks and give yourself a pep talk.
4. Practice Positive Thinking
I know what it’s like when I am feeling extra negative and people around me tell me to “just change your thinking” or “just be happy”. As if it’s as easy as flipping a switch.
I’m not here to tell you to change your thinking right now and “just be positive”. It’s, unfortunately, not that easy. It takes time to get rid of negative thinking. The way we are programmed to think and believe can be engrained in us over years and years.
We develop habits in our ways of thinking, and it’s difficult to try to change that within a day. And, the more you believe a negative thought to be true, the harder it is to let go of that thought.
What you can do is slowly practice bringing in more positive thoughts. Start small, and work on it daily. Tips on how to practice positive thinking:
Come up with a short affirmation that’s easy to repeat like, “I am grateful for my life”, “I am calm”, “I’m awesome”, or “I love myself”. Keeping it short makes it easier to remember.
Avoid negative words in your positive talk. Instead of saying “I won’t be afraid today”, say “I will be brave today”
Do what feels right. Don’t say positive words that go against what you truly believe. That’s why keeping it simple and doing it on your terms will stick better because it’s on your terms. If you don’t fully believe in an affirmation, skip it and find one that does work for you.
Be sure to download your FREE mental wellness kit! You will find all of the ebooks pictured above and more! Just let me know where to send your access link by entering your email address below:
5. Stop the Black or White Thinking
Do you find that you end up using extreme words to describe negative things in your life?
Words like always, never, every time, hate. When you get in an argument with a friend and say they “always make you feel terrible about yourself”.
This is black-or-white thinking. There is no in-between, which leaves very little room for flexibility. It’s why negative thoughts start to form because there isn’t room for anything else.
Black-and-white thinking isn’t how the world works. There are so many possibilities for one thing, and believing there is only one way to do something is very limiting. It causes stress and anxiety and you get lost in the cycle of negative thoughts.
Instead, try practicing gray thinking. This opens up your mind for more optimism. For a quick and easy exercise, practice finding the middle between these words:
Black— White
Near— Far
Young—Old
Think of these words and what comes in between those two. Between black and white are all of the other colors that are possibly out there.
You don’t need to get rid of negative thinking all by yourself. Oftentimes it helps to vent to someone. You can get a free trial of Betterhelp and chat with a therapist anytime, via this special link.
Between near and far is always the middle. And there are many different terms for people who aren’t young or old. Middle-aged. And even still, being young can be anything from a newborn to 45. Being old can be anywhere from 25 to 100, depending on how you look at things.
Do you see how black-or-white thinking isn’t very logical? With so many things that come in between, only focusing on the negative isn’t very realistic.
6 Ways To Get Rid Of Negative Thinking – Conclusion
No matter what, when it comes to figuring out how to get rid of negative thinking, remember this. The next time you find a negative thought floating in, try to think about the gray areas instead of the extremes.
For example, let’s say you interviewed for a job and never got a callback.
Black-and-white thinking is “I did terribly during the interview and they hated me.”
Grey thinking is “There are so many reasons why they didn’t call me back, and I might not ever know the real reason. It could have been anything from they were too busy to tell me I didn’t get it, or they thought I was a good fit but they interviewed someone else who was even more qualified.”
You don’t instantly have to go to the worst thoughts in your head. That’s self-sabotage and it ruins your confidence. Learn more about how to stop self-sabotaging behavior.
I hope you found these tips for ways to get rid of negative thinking. If you did, please use the share buttons below or at the top of this page to share it across your social media, so that someone else can enjoy it too.
How can you learn how to be more confident with who you are? I know that feeling 100% confident in yourself can be a challenge.
Mainly because it’s difficult to keep it consistent. You may have days where you feel on top of the world, and other days where you feel unworthy of anything.
Unfortunately, how we feel about ourselves can affect a lot of things in our lives. Our relationships can suffer when we aren’t confident, and it’s hard to even want to get out of bed when you aren’t happy with how your life is going.
To be happy with who you are means figuring yourself out in a number of ways.
How To Be More Confident With Who You Are
Confidence comes from within, and it’s easy to lose sight of that. Especially when there are so many outside factors like money or materialistic things) that temporarily make us feel great but after a while leaves us feeling empty.
Instead of taking the easy road and finding things that temporarily fill your happiness, you have to take the time to build yourself up.
So that even when you aren’t feeling great, it’s not because you aren’t okay with who you are.
It’s just because it’s a bad day or you’re in a funk that you know you’ll pull out of because you have that confidence in yourself.
1. Start Trusting Yourself More
There may be times when you feel incompetent and like your self-confidence is long gone.
Life is not always easy, and there are events that happen that test us. Whether that’s a bad relationship, a shitty job, or someone passing away.
When the rug gets pulled out from under us, it’s difficult to keep things in perspective. You might wonder why you even tried in the first place and question everything.
Some people choose to let their own difficulties knock them down and they avoid ever trying again.
Trying HURTS. Rejection hurts. Living sometimes hurts. Enduring life when you have felt pain is a test to your will.
Trusting yourself during the toughest times is how you will ultimately find confidence and happiness within yourself.
Same with building resilience and overcoming the fear of failure. When you believe you can make it through to the other side, you are finding ways to trust yourself. But, you have to push through when you’re uncomfortable.
That means getting rejected and putting yourself out there to possibly get shot down.
Eventually, you build up so much tolerance to things that you just learn how to survive through it all. You’ll break through that barrier and find you can make it through just about anything.
2. Recognize the Thoughts That are Preventing you From Being Happy
Telling you that you can be happy right now, no matter your circumstances sounds too easy. If it was that easy, there wouldn’t be countless books and blog posts written about it.
Just change your mindset! That’s all there is to it. Yeah, I hear your skeptical laugh as I write this.
The thoughts we have every day have more control than we like to admit. What you have to do is become more aware of what they are saying to you.
The thoughts that are saying “I’m not good enough to date someone like that.” or “if I lost 20 pounds, I’d be a lot more confident and a lot happier.”
If you ever come across thinking something similar, this is preventing you from being happy with who you are right now.
Trying to fix those things you are unhappy about will result in MORE unhappiness. Why are you giving power and value to thoughts that are preventing you from being happy right now?
I’ve gone through a period of feeling pretty low, and not seeing the purpose in my life. Basically, for a whole year, I felt that way. I didn’t see what my value was and some days I wondered what the point was.
It was because I allowed other people’s negativity to get into my head and break me down. Which resulted in a lot of unhappy days, even when nothing was wrong.
What changed was training myself to believe I was good enough.
It meant practicing self-care and working on the parts of who I am that I’m not confident in. Instead of changing those things, I’m learning to embrace them. But, one thing to remember is that it takes time.
Nothing drastic happens overnight, and you will need to work on it daily.
3. Find positive people to hang out with
My sister is my rock and she always helps me see the value in who I am, even when I don’t see it.
No matter what, you need a supportive person in your life who will always reassure you that what you’re doing is good.
The world is full of way too much negativity, and it’s too easy to get sucked into it. But, there are also a lot of really freaking great people out there.
Even if you don’t have anyone in your life right now, make it a point to find someone. I could be your supportive friend if you want!
Find a supportive positive person (or people) who want to build you up. They are out there, and they can do wonders to help bring more happiness into your life.
I like to think that if these people are choosing to hang out with me, I must be doing something right. That brings me enough confidence to see that I must be a good person to be around, and once you feel that way, it’s easier to be happy with who you are.
4. Work On Changing Things That Aren’t Bringing You Happiness
Do you have a close friend who you care about a lot, but who always seems to take and not give a whole lot? Or are you in a relationship with a guy who isn’t quite the right fit, but you don’t want to go through the motions of breaking up?
If you are in a situation in your life where things aren’t bringing you happiness, and are the cause for your unhappiness, work on changing them.
I know, easier said than done. But, eventually, we end up so miserable that something ends up happening whether we like it or not.
Change is inevitable, and if something feels wrong in your life, it probably is.
This is a tough one because some people don’t like to admit that there is a problem. They don’t want to see their friends leave because they care a lot and don’t want to inflict pain on anyone.
So we stay still, even if we are secretly miserable, to avoid anything bad happening to anything else.
You aren’t a terrible person if it’s the people around you who are draining your energy and causing you to be miserable.
And you aren’t a terrible person if you choose to change your circumstances for a chance at a better life.
Start by evaluating your life. Base things off of the 80/20 rule for a week.
If you realize that your job or relationship makes you miserable 5 out of the 7 days of the week, something probably needs to change.
Letting go is tough, but if you know in your heart that letting go will bring you happiness, you know deep down you have to do it.
5. Understand What Happiness Means to You
What brings happiness is different for everyone. My happiness comes from the comfort of my home, with my dogs, my boyfriend, and my huge family.
What are some things that bring you happiness? Is it a specific day of the week? A coffee shop nearby? Write them down!
Get your thoughts out of your head and figure out what brings you happiness. If you are in a state of mind where it feels like nothing brings you happiness, start small.
The reason why I say this is because as we grow up and have to focus more on reality than our well-being, it’s easy to lose sight of the things that make us feel good.
What are some moments where you have truly enjoyed yourself? Channel inside and think about what things make you happy! If you still need help with this part, you can always email me.
6. Stay Consistent With Your Efforts
Building confidence means changing your thoughts. Which means it will take time and effort on your part.
Just like working out, it’s something you have to do often if you want to see results. And it’s definitely possible.
But sometimes we don’t think we need to work on ourselves. It’s difficult to put yourself first sometimes. Confidence comes from within, and that starts with you.
7. Start A Blog
Starting a money-making blog is something anyone can do, and it can be very lucrative.
A blog is a business, and having your own business allows you to take control of your income. This can give you a new lease on life. As your own boss, you will learn so many new skills! You will surprise yourself with how savvy you can be.
The confidence that comes from owning your own business is like no other. Blogging has made me a much more confident person, and the money I make from my blog is now more than I ever made at a job. I’m a full-time blogger now and couldn’t be happier.
If you make a commitment to work on yourself and your mindset, you can have more confidence. But learning how to do that takes a good teacher to show you what to do.
Did you know that there are amazing online training resources to help you build confidence from the inside out?
A Course In Gorgeous is the best training to help you build confidence and remove negative thinking for an overall mindset and balance makeover. It teaches you how to tackle mental roadblocks that are preventing you from truly enjoying your life.
This course will not only help you feel confident and gorgeous in your own skin, but it teaches you how to put yourself first and get rid of negative thinking once and for all.
A Course in Gorgeous teaches you exactly how to make the necessary changes in your life and start feeling confident almost immediately.
How does one overcome self-doubt? Ah, self-doubt. It’s what gets into your head when you’re unsure about your abilities.
Whether that’s from something you’ve never done before or that one thing you’ve done a million times before.
Questioning yourself is natural. It’s what we do when we are trying to reflect on ourselves.
We want to make sure we are doing a good job, and living up to our standards.
When self-doubt does come into your head, it can quickly diminish your confidence
And sometimes it happens because we feel a little extra sensitive to things. But, these thoughts can actually become debilitating.
Doubting yourself can cause fear. Which will prevent you from trying in the first place.
Then it will make you question everything you do, leaving you wondering if you’ll ever be good enough to deserve what you want.
How to Overcome Self-Doubt and Boost Your Confidence
1. Speak up About Your doubt
It’s so easy to build up assumptions in our heads. When something goes wrong at work, you might question yourself and rethink if you’re even cut out for that position.
Whenever something goes wrong, we beat ourselves up internally. Because we are supposed to be on top of things, and we are supposed to be perfect at everything. Right?
Wrong.
There is no such thing as perfection! So push that thought out of your head. Instead, turn to people who can help reassure you that you are doing just fine.
If you keep things to yourself, it can quickly build up in your head.
Telling yourself you aren’t good enough and nobody really likes you anyway are thoughts that aren’t true.
They are just things you make up in your head because it feels true. But, this is why you need to talk to someone about it. Ask them if you’re doing a bad job at your job.
I can promise they will say no, and reassure you that you’re a great part of the team. We are so good about beating ourselves up and making sure that we don’t feel much pride in our work. Even if you are pretty close to perfect at your job.
That’s why it’s always good to get a second opinion and a different perspective.
Because other people see you differently than you see yourself. They value you and the right people want to be there to make sure you don’t have any self-doubt.
2. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
It’s so easy to do. You see someone else at school who gets straight A’s and makes it look so easy.
They must be born with a skill that automatically makes them smart. There’s no way to compete with that. Well, you should stop competing at all.
There is no point in comparing yourself to others, except to make yourself feel worse.
And the best way to avoid doing this is by looking at it from a different perspective. Instead of telling yourself false assumptions, work at becoming a better person. Chances are that person who gets straight A’s probably has to work really hard.
They most likely study any free second they get, and there’s a chance they are struggling with self-doubt as well.
If you think about how hard it is to maintain that, then imagine how hard it is if you fall short.
Put yourself in their shoes for a second. And try to tell yourself that they might be struggling too. It’s easy to assume other people have it better than you, but everyone is dealing with something.
Some people are really good at hiding it, but no one is perfect.
Once you believe this, it’ll be easier to stop comparing yourself. And it might make you appreciate what you do have and what you are capable of.
3. Separate Yourself from the Cause of Your Self-Doubt
When you are at work for 40 hours a week, the cycle of self-doubt repeats itself every day. When you are constantly surrounded by the things that are causing doubt, then you need to take a break.
I know that sometimes it’s not possible, because we can’t just stop showing up to work or school. But, you do have control once you get home and I’m sure you have at least an hour a day you could use to get away.
Spend some time doing something you really enjoy, that you know you are good at. Something that makes you feel really good. And forget about what’s causing your self-doubt. We can get so wrapped up in feeling bad about ourselves.
Even when we get home, going on social media can bring us back into the cycle. That’s where we start comparing ourselves to other people who seem to have their lives figured out.
This is when you need to shut your phone off and go on a hike. Or hang out with people you really care about and ask them to not let you talk about the things that are bugging you.
It’s really important to take a break and not obsess over what’s causing you stress.
When you can learn how to separate yourself from the crap, it’s easier to get a new outlook. Read this guide to dealing with anxiety at work, which gives you a daily routine for managing your anxiety.
4. Write Down 3 Things You Love About Yourself Every Day
Thinking about what you love about yourself isn’t the easiest when you’re filled with self-doubt. You might think that you don’t like anything about who you are.
But, digging deep and understanding yourself more will give you more confidence. Think of the things that you are good at.
Are you a good person who cares about other people? Do you love animals? Is there a specific body type of yours that you love?
Grab a piece of paper and pencil and write it down. Then, do this every single day.
At first, it will feel weird, and maybe selfish. But, it’s not. And those thoughts are your self-doubt coming in to tell you it’s pointless. Ignore that voice, and do it anyway.
Then, you’ll start to discover what does make you so great. And you’ll remember these things when you question yourself. Which will make you believe in yourself more.
5. Tell Your Inner Critic to Shut Up
That inner voice that is always talking down to you needs to be quiet. What that voice is telling you isn’t true.
It’s a very convincing voice, but what it’s saying doesn’t provide any value to you.
Imagine if that’s how your best friend talked about themselves.
You would quickly tell them to stop being ridiculous and that they are great just as they are. You are perfect just as you are now. And those voices that tell you otherwise are liars. Don’t give in to that inner critic.
Tell it to shut up, and focus on doing the things you enjoy. Because you deserve them!
How To Overcome Self-Doubt And Boost Your Confidence – Conclusion
If you are having trouble building your confidence or getting rid of self-doubt, A Course In Gorgeous would be a great fit for you!
This course will not only help you feel confident and gorgeous in your own skin, but it teaches you how to put yourself first and get rid of self-doubt once and for all.
If you are ready to make some changes in your life, this is where you should start. A Course in Gorgeous teaches you exactly how to make the necessary changes in your life and start feeling confident almost immediately.
A Course In Gorgeous is an all-inclusive, 12-part online course that teaches you how to tackle mental roadblocks that are preventing you from truly enjoying your life.
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