Confidence is the key to success. Building confidence comes naturally when you feel good about yourself and believe in your abilities.
If you don’t have confidence, it can be hard to take on new challenges or try something new that might make you feel uncomfortable. It’s all about finding ways how to boost confidence and self-esteem and build up your self-belief to succeed in all aspects of your life.
1. Learn That Not Everyone Will Like You
We’re going to let you in on a little secret – not everyone is going to like you. There are some people who might think that you’re rude, uninteresting, boring, or just plain unlikeable. Even if they don’t say it directly (and most won’t), they will probably think it.
So what? Why should this bother you? The answer is simple: because it shouldn’t! People who dislike others for arbitrary reasons (like the color of their hair) are insecure and unhappy. They need someone else in order to feel okay about themselves. So when they don’t get their way, they get angry and lash out at others instead of taking responsibility for their own shortcomings.
You should never try to please everyone because doing so will make it impossible for anyone to really know who you really are or what makes up your personality as a whole person with strengths and weaknesses alike.
2. Report Your Inner Critic
To report your inner critic, ask yourself: “What is the voice in my head saying right now?” This is a question you can ask yourself anytime, anywhere. It’s also one that will help you to gain insight into what exactly your inner critic is up to on any given day. You might think this sounds easy and obvious, but it’s actually quite difficult for many people, who tend not to be very aware of their own thoughts and feelings.
So we often need some help before we can identify these internal voices with any precision or clarity! The good news is that there are some simple techniques that can help us get better at knowing ourselves better – which includes knowing when our own self-talk isn’t serving us well.
3. Believe in Yourself
Believing in yourself is a key part of success. You need to believe that you can achieve your goals, or else you won’t go near them. You also need to believe in yourself for the long term, rather than just for one day or week. If your self-esteem is low and you don’t believe in yourself at all, then it’s unlikely that anyone else will either! So start believing in yourself today and tell others about how amazing you are too!
4. Set Attainable Goals
Goals are great! They give you something to strive for, and they can keep you motivated when times get tough. The key is to make sure your goals are realistic. Don’t set yourself up for failure by trying to do too much at once or taking on something that’s just not possible within the time frame you’ve given yourself.
5. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others
One of the easiest ways to boost your confidence and self-esteem is to stop comparing yourself to others. It doesn’t matter who you are or what you’ve accomplished in life, there will always be someone else whose life looks better than yours. You could be the richest person in town, but if that person next door has a nicer car, or vacations more often than you do, then all bets are off.
Think about it: do you like being around people who constantly talk about how much better everything is for them? Of course not! Why should we even expect ourselves to be any different?
When we compare ourselves with others, we’re bound to come up short and feel less confident because of it. But when we focus on our own strengths and weaknesses in an honest way, then our confidence can grow without comparison getting in the way!
6. Do Things You Are Good At
If you want to boost your confidence and self-esteem, do things that make you feel good. This might sound silly, but it really works. If you can do something that makes you feel successful, or like you’re making a difference in the world (even if it’s small), then that is going to give you more motivation and energy.
Even better – when you take on challenges in which there are many variables at play and no one is sure how it will turn out, that feeling of uncertainty can actually be positive!
7. Don’t Give in to Your Limiting Beliefs
Limiting beliefs are often our biggest obstacle. They’re like little voices that tell us we can’t do something, or that we aren’t good enough for something. If you could hear the things your limiting beliefs are saying to yourself, we guarantee they would be pretty harsh. Limiting beliefs can become so ingrained in us that sometimes we don’t even realize they exist anymore!
One way to get rid of your limiting beliefs is by challenging them with positive ones – ones that are more realistic and motivating. But if you’re not sure how to go about this process, here’s an example.
Say one of your limiting beliefs is “I’m not smart enough.” Maybe it’s because people have told you this before or maybe it’s because someone else has dealt with a similar situation. Whatever the reason might be, challenging this belief will help bring more positivity into your life by making room for better ones such as “I’m smart enough” or even “I am a genius.”
Takeaway
We’re all human, and we all have moments when we feel like our confidence is lacking. But there are ways to boost it fast, and your self-esteem will thank you for it! Take a moment now to think of one thing that makes you proud of your self-esteem. Perhaps it’s something as simple as eating healthy food or having time alone each day.
You can even take advantage of personal development courses like the Refine Your Life Purpose and Wellness Course Bundle. These small things can build up over time, so don’t be afraid to start with something easy and move on to bigger goals later on!
Where to find happiness? It’s an age-old question and the simple answer is: Happiness is found within yourself. The type of happiness that lasts and is truly fulfilling is within you and is not dependent on others.
What more can be satisfying than the chance to enjoy life at its best? A good life is rarely a luxurious one. More than the possession of material things, a good life must be one wherein you laugh more, cry less, and feel gratitude.
The truth about people is that they come and go. Nobody stays with you permanently, including your spouse or children. They all have their own lives and you cannot always tie these people to you. The same is true with material things, titles, power, and events that make you happy. While these things can make you happy, the happiness associated with these things is only temporary. If you want that satisfying, no-guilt kind of happiness, you need to look within yourself.
Be a champion of your own life
One of the many reasons we find it hard to be happy is that we tend to sabotage ourselves. When something good happens, we love to overthink and discount the fact that we deserve it. In the back of our minds, we question if we’re allowed to be this happy or start thinking that our happiness will come with a price.
You see, tomorrow is never certain. No one knows for sure if we’ll be here, so we might as well make the most of what’s today. Enjoy and bask in your happiness without feeling guilty. Be a champion of your life because happiness, contentment, and satisfaction are an inside job — nobody can do it for you.
Work on your goals
Some people engage the services of a life coach to help them get on track. While this is helpful, remember that a life coach can only help you if you also supply the discipline and the burning desire to achieve your goals. They may be working closely with you, but nothing will happen if you refuse to help yourself. Again, this is another classic example of the reality that you are the captain of your own ship — the master of your destiny.
When you say desire, it’s not just “wanting” to change something. It takes self-discipline. This means that you must be committed to yourself and your own goals and that no matter how challenging your circumstances are, you won’t fall back to your old destructive patterns.
While a life coach can help you achieve positive results in your life, it’s you who will carry much of the work. You have to break your old patterns. You have to move out of your comfort zone. You have to commit to change. It’s like working out in the gym with a fitness coach. Even if your coach plans your workout and fitness goals, you will do most of the work because it’s your body. The plan will only prosper if the subject is willing, committed, and does the work.
Break the negative mindset chain
When you ask people if they consider themselves successful, only a handful will answer that they are. Why? Because most are caught in the negative belief system that success is hard to earn and that they’re not worthy of success. These negative thought processes will manifest themselves in your life results.
You may wonder why despite your effort, you still can’t get that promotion. You may also wonder why even if you spend more time working, you’re not earning enough money. If you find yourself in these situations, remember to work on your belief system first.
You can start working on your negative thoughts by turning on your “flashlight of awareness” and you will then see how much potential you are hiding because of your limiting belief systems. This is the first step in claiming your birthright to success.
When you were younger, your parents might have unknowingly conditioned you to limit yourself. For example, when you were trying to reach for the cup in the cupboard, your mother stopped you because you might fall and get hurt. The motive might be good, but this harmless act can lead a grown person to think that he shouldn’t try to do risky things because he might get hurt.
Help yourself identify these negative thoughts and transform them into positive ones. Now, instead of saying “you can’t,” you’ll confidently claim that you can.
Be accountable for your own life, decisions, and results
Another reason why people can’t find happiness within and by themselves is that they love to point fingers. They blame everyone except themselves. You see, if you take control of your life, it’s less burdensome and less complicated. You act for yourself and not to please others. You also become more attached to your plans because you know you’ll benefit the most from your successes.
The sad reality is that people love to complain. If something doesn’t turn in their favor, they blame everyone else except themselves. If you ask yourself why you’re not living your dream life, you may catch yourself saying any of these common excuses:
That your parents are poor, and you never had the means;
That your parents weren’t able to send you to a great school;
That your professor in college was unfair and inconsiderate; or
That life didn’t open opportunities for you.
You blamed everyone else except yourself. Maybe the only reason you’re not living your dream life is that you keep making excuses and refuse to take action. This can be a source of resentment too. Because you think someone’s controlling your life, you rebel against them and suffer the consequences miserably.
If you supply the desire and commitment to change, you can point yourself in the right direction. By realizing what you could have done better, you take responsibility and work towards positive change. You make your goals, plot action plans to achieve these goals, and cheer yourself as you work your way to your dream life.
Understand relationships with the people in your life
Resentment, disappointment, and hatred happen if people misunderstand how other people show and communicate their feelings. If you find that many of your issues with other people tend to lean on your own negative perceptions rather than the basic facts. Just because we perceive someone has wronged us or does not care – doesn’t mean we are always right. Often we twist things into a negative light due to our own insecurities. It is for our own happiness and successful relationships that we explore possible misunderstandings and clarify with others to fact-check our interpretations of actions.
By realizing these barriers, you relieve yourself of the burden to try and fit others’ perceptions and ideas of things in the universe. You also hate less. You no longer get disappointed quickly and become more tolerant of the people in your life. Instead of spending your time and energy on these negative emotions, you let them go because you now understand it’s not because of you. At the end of the day, you learn to be genuinely happy and at peace with the people in your life, your thoughts, and yourself.
Takeaway
We can conclude that happiness is found within. We are responsible for our happiness and no one else can be our source of happiness alone. Sometimes, we chase people, titles, and events, hoping to find happiness in them. After a while, we realize that the happiness they bring is fleeting.
We have the power to be happy regardless of what is happening around us. We can be happy despite what other people think of us.
Life can be a difficult journey. The world has a penchant for throwing unexpected curveballs. Things like sudden car trouble, illness in the family, or trouble at work are tough to deal with when you’re already doing well. When you’re struggling already, these surprise difficulties can create situations that seem almost impossible to deal with.
Luckily, you’re not alone. While everyone’s journey through life is different, absolutely every person on the planet will hit a rough patch every once in a while. Here are some of the top tips that successful people give for getting through these tough times without pulling your hair out.
1) Accept The Inevitable. Change the Changeable.
Attitude is important. The way you think and feel about a problem can have a massive impact on how you deal with it. It’s incredibly common for people to get fixated on problems that they simply cannot affect, allowing the issue to cast a massive, negative shadow over their daily life. Don’t do this! Some things are truly unchangeable. Try to think of these things as passive obstacles that you have to overcome. It’s okay to complain about them every once in a while, but make sure your goal is to climb over the mountain, not to whine about it.
One of the best things you can do when faced with an impossible situation is to analyze it and figure out what parts you can change. Life’s challenges tend to be complex and usually have multiple components that you can interact with. Even if you can’t change the core of a problem, you can often take action to make the other parts more manageable. For example, there’s not a lot you can do about a loved one being diagnosed with a terminal illness. You can, however, spend time with them, make sure they’re comfortable, and make sure that appropriate end-of-life arrangements are put into place before it’s too late. The core of the problem is still there. It’s still important to take steps to increase your ability to deal with the situation.
The flip side of this is that many people tend to give up on small and medium issues too quickly. There are a lot of things in life that are very much under your control. Many of these are difficult to change, requiring effort stretched out over months or years. Others just require a few short, difficult interactions. Don’t put these off. If there’s something that’s bothering you, make sure that you’re doing everything you can to fix things. This might mean starting a long journey of self-improvement, finally making a tough phone call that you’ve been putting off, or just doing a bunch of unpleasant chores around the house. Bite the bullet and start as soon as you can. Even if it doesn’t seem like a big deal, reducing small stressors can have a profound impact on your overall quality of life.
2) Don’t Fight Alone
When the going gets tough, don’t be afraid to reach out. Talking to a friend about your situation can have a profoundly positive effect on the way you think about your problem and give you insights into what you might be able to do to fix things – and this is without your friend doing anything other than being a good listener. Your friends can often offer recommendations from their experience in similar situations and volunteer valuable help so you don’t have to pull yourself up by your bootstraps. You shouldn’t expect them to solve your problems for you. Sometimes, however, your issue will turn out to be something that they can fix almost effortlessly. When you suffer alone, you miss the opportunity to take advantage of this.
Some issues are difficult to share with friends. Other times, you’re stuck in a long-term rut. Other issues are just hard. If you feel like you’re not in a good place mentally, reach out to a mental health professional sooner rather than later. Counselors, therapists, and psychiatrists won’t judge you or your problems. Instead, they’ll try to offer as much help as they can and give you a safe space that you can use to figure out how you can tackle life’s issues. These days, affordable therapy is accessible and easy to find. Don’t wait until you’ve fallen into a deep rut to seek out a professional. Instead, try to talk to one as soon as you can to keep your journey as happy and healthy as possible.
3) Remember the Importance of Self-Care
The harder life is, the easier it is to forget about self-care activities. Try not to do this. Instead, try to do the opposite. Tougher tasks and stressful days will require you to be at your best, meaning you should put even more effort into taking care of yourself.
First, prioritize the basics. Try to make sure you get plenty of sleep. Set a strict bedtime, practice good sleep hygiene, and don’t let friends and work trick you into staying up late when you don’t want to.
Eat well. Make sure you’re following a healthy diet. Spending time on meal prep might seem impossible in your current situation, but you’ll appreciate your easy meals later on when it’s time to eat. It’ll also give you a forced break from the other activities that are stressing you out. Even if meal prep isn’t your thing, make sure that you’re taking the time and effort to eat healthy foods in appropriate quantities at the right intervals. Skipping lunch will almost never help reduce your stress level.
Be sure to exercise. It’s hard to find time for exercise during a difficult life period, but it’s something you should prioritize. Don’t limit yourself to ruling out exercise altogether because you’re too stressed or don’t have enough time to go to the gym. You can fit in several walks around your work or at home between other activities you’re doing or even go for a jog, do yoga, and do other types of exercise you like. Exercise will help increase your energy levels and allow you to maintain a more positive outlook during the rest of your day. It’ll also provide a forced break. Many of the most successful individuals on the planet swear by their daily jog or walk. It’s often the source of their best ideas, as It gives them an incredible opportunity to tackle their issues from a different perspective.
Take care of your environment. If you’re stressed, it’s easy to fall behind on keeping your house clean or let your workplace become messy. This can have a pretty big effect on your mental outlook. If you can, try to find time to build an environment that you enjoy spending time in. It might not seem like a great use of your time immediately, but you’ll be a lot happier when you work and relax in the future.
None of these things are one-time activities. All of these self-care journeys are just that: journeys. When life throws an unexpected curveball, don’t start sprinting backward along these other paths. Even if you don’t think you can make progress forward in terms of your diet, exercise, sleep schedule, or environment, do your best to at least stay where you are at the very least. This will have a profound impact on giving you the stability you need to tackle your other problems.
You’re valuable. When you’re working through a rough patch, it’s easy to lose track of this idea. It’s even easier to neglect to take proper action and fail to treat yourself well. Try not to do this! The harder life is, the more important it is to take a little bit of time off and do things you enjoy.
No matter how hard your problems seem, make space for you to have fun. This might mean going on a hike, having a spa day, spending time with friends, or seeing a movie. If you can’t find time for these activities, try to find ways to treat yourself within the confines of your busy schedule. This might mean ordering a nice meal, having something you like shipped to your house, or upgrading your environment. You’re worth a bit of time, money, and effort. Not only will these activities help you feel better, but they’ll also give you space from your problems and provide a valuable break for your brain.
You shouldn’t ever let yourself feel guilty for taking a short, appropriate break for self-care. That said, be mindful of your goal here: you want to sharpen the saw, so to speak, not run from your problems. Some people go overboard and take too much time off, allowing their issues to grow more frightening while they’re away. Using your weekend as personal time instead of going into the office is probably a good idea. Taking a whole week off of work when you’ve got a major project deadline approaching probably isn’t.
5) Work Through It
A lot of the time, our biggest problems can be solved by a blast of concentrated effort. This can be hard for a lot of reasons: our problems might be abstract, meaning we won’t see progress. The actual work involved is often tedious, difficult, or both. We’re also not always used to giving it 100% every day, making the shift into high gear a hard, unfamiliar process.
Don’t let these barriers dissuade you. Instead, try to put your best foot forward every day and make as much progress towards your goals as you can. Even if you don’t see results, concentrate on doing your best. You’ll start building positive habits, making it easier to continue. As long as you don’t give up, you’ll continue to make positive progress and eventually hit your ideal endpoint.
Remember: it’s a marathon, not a sprint. Even if you can’t give 100% on a given day, show up and try to get something done. As the saying goes, a journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. No matter how bad you feel, try to at least put your shoes on and walk out to the path. From there, it’ll be a lot easier to make a few steps and bring your destination a little bit closer. You might not be able to see it, but it’ll really help when it comes to the overall journey.
6) Compare Carefully
Modern social media makes it almost trivial to feel small. All you need to do is open your favorite website or app to be blasted with images of the most beautiful and successful people in the world.
Try to avoid comparing your situations with the ones that you see on the internet. Photos, posts, and stories have to survive an incredibly competitive environment to show up on your feed. This means that you’ll only see the prettiest faces, the best houses, and the most talented people out of literally millions of submissions. If you compare yourself to the very best in any given category, you’re almost always going to come up short, even if you’re incredibly talented and successful yourself.
Try not to compare yourself with your friends and family either. Everyone’s journey through life is different. Some people are blessed with incredible, unfair opportunities. Others aren’t. This means that you shouldn’t feel bad because a friend is more successful than you. It also means you shouldn’t try to base your self-worth on how much better you’re doing than other people.
You can, however, learn a lot from successful people. This means that occasional, mindful comparison of specific things can be incredibly valuable. If you’re in sales, for example, don’t get hung up on the difference between your monthly sales and the person with the most sales in the department. Do think about comparing the way you both approach a sale and see what they do differently. Other people struggle with the same sort of obstacles and challenges that you do. Taking the time to analyze their approach and seeing how they overcome these challenges and obstacles can give you new tools and techniques that you can use to make your own life easier.
What To Do When Life Gets Hard
Everyone’s journey through life is different. One thing that we all have in common, however, is that all of our journeys get rough at some point. When this happens, things will be tough. There usually isn’t a miracle fix. It happens to everyone. You can, however, take some steps to make things a bit easier on yourself and maximize your ability to work through your problems. Fix what you can fix, accept what you can’t, and put yourself in a position where you can accept the help of others. Look for affordable therapy, make time for self-care activities, and stay on top of your basic needs. Put in as much work as you can to move forward and get past your current obstacles. Finally, make sure that you’re not basing your self-worth on unfair comparisons to others while keeping yourself open to learning new techniques and skills from people in similar situations.
Utilizing these techniques and ideas won’t magic your problems away. It will still take a lot of time, energy, and effort to get through your rough patch. You might not see results right away. Over time, though, you’ll begin to pull out of your slump and make progress toward tackling your personal challenges. These techniques will make the journey a little bit faster and more pleasant, putting you back on the path you want to be on.
When you ask people if they consider themselves successful, only a handful will answer that they are. Why? Because most are caught in the negative belief system that success is hard to earn and that they’re not worthy of success. These negative thought processes will manifest themselves in your life results. 
